{ This moment } – No photo, just words…

{ This moment } – A Friday ritual. A single photo – no words No photo – just words – capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary gut wrenching moment. A moment I want to pause, savor grieve and remember.

 If you’re inspired to do the same, leave a link to your ‘moment’ in the comments for all to find and see. Inspired by SouleMama.

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I have no picture to share today. Actually, I have no pictures. I always thought myself to be a pretty rational person. I’ve been talking a great deal about letting go, non attachments to objects, memories living in our hearts and mind, not in the things we possess… *sheds a tear*

This week, we decided to back up our computer on an external hard drive in order to wipe our computer clean. It had been running slow and instead of falling into the “we need a new computer” trap, we decided to return it to its original empty brand new self. So on the secondary hard drive all of our personal documents and files went and wipe went our computer.

This morning, wanting to get a silly picture I took of my soon earlier this week to post on this segment, I was hit in the face : The transfer did not work. Although all folders were created, something happened and they were all empty.

I don’t know if this has ever happened to you, but my first reaction was to disbelieve it. Couldn’t be! I had over 5000 pictures of my kids growing up on there. And then it suddenly hit me : I had over 5000 pictures of my kids growing up on there.

*cries a little more*

So if I’m quiet for a few days, it’s because I’m desperately trying to get in contact with everyone I’ve ever sent pictures too. I’ll be busy sorting through sent boxes in my emails and saving images from my old Facebook profile that was BY MIRACLE not deleted after I cancelled it over a month ago. I’ll be going through my blog (Thank goodness for this space I’ve created) and my parents’ computer for anything I can find.

And I will be grieving. For I know that memories do not reside in material possession, and I will be okay, but for now, I will allow myself to cry.

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About Yanic A.

Hello to all of you and thank you for stopping by! My name is Yanic. I'm a wife to a wonderful husband, a mother of 2 beautifully complex and unique children and a lover of all things inspiring. Having started a personal journey of self discovery when I found out I was pregnant with my daughter 4 years ago, I've since embraced a daily life of simpler pleasures and gratitude. As we get to know each other, you will know me as a quilter, a gardener, a Tao cultivator, a vegetarian foodie, a true believer in a healthy family life as being the secret to my happiness and hopefully as time goes on, a friend... I will try to share with you my days as they unfold, speaking of my happy successes without censoring my challenges, trying to make this blog a true portrait of the ever-changing path that I have chosen for myself. I'm hoping to find in these pages others to share with and learn from, bringing to light the absolute connection in all things and people, showing this world as being a true community.
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24 Responses to { This moment } – No photo, just words…

  1. sophiezest says:

    I can’t believe it! I’m so sorry.

    Like

    • Yanic A. says:

      Thank you… If you haven’t backed up your stuff, do it! Do it in multiple places… just do it. I’m still shaking. My husband is at work not able to think about anything else. I feel like I’ve been robbed. It’s a horrible feeling.

      Like

      • sophiezest says:

        In October I spilled a glass of water on my laptop keyboard. It made a lot of crackling noises and died. I hadn’t backed it up. I was very lucky because I was able to retrieve the data, but it was a wake-up call. I had photos on there, work documents, manuscripts. I really feel for you, Yanic.

        Like

      • Yanic A. says:

        Thank you again… I had so much on there too : Our entire finances, tax papers, investment info, all the documents from when we bought the house, backup folders for my husband’s immigration documents, 100s of hours of music… but all I care about right now are my pictures. I’m up to 512 recovered… far cry from over 5000, but I’ll take what I can get!

        Like

  2. Oh no, so sorry Yanic. I can just imagine how you feel. Hugs. I hope you are able to find many photos as you search through your emails, FB and friends/family files.

    Like

    • Yanic A. says:

      Thank you Kim… There is hope, My cousin sent me a link to a software that apparently works miracles. They claim they can even retrieve files on reformatted drives. If that is the case, I’m kind of confused as to I’ve always thought that reformatting a drive meant to wipe it completely clean, but if it gives me the last 3 years of my life in photos back, I won’t try and wonder how, I’ll just praise the heavens for this gift. So far I have been very lucky at getting quite a few back. Luckily, my family and friends seem to be as bad as me at clearing their inboxes. 🙂 If you haven’t backed your computer up, do it… believe me, you don’t want to go through this!
      xo

      Like

  3. Would hold you while you cry…:(

    Like

    • Yanic A. says:

      Thank you, you are very sweet…
      I’m running and rerunning this program hoping to recover some photos, but I’ve only been able to recover a few. I keep reminding myself that when I was a kid, my parents only took a few pictures a year. I have a small album that covers my first 4 years of my life. Today has been exhausting.

      Like

  4. sally says:

    Oh no, I’m so sorry. I once lost about a month’s worth of photos and I was gutted about that, it was a few years ago now but there are still a few photos in that month that are in my head that I grieve over. I can’t imagine losing 3 years. Fingers crossed you retrieve more, and as you say, thank goodness for FB, blogs, family etc.

    Like

    • Yanic A. says:

      Thank you sally… So far, I’ve retrieved almost 700. Although some I had already backed up so they weren’t lost. (I had everything up to my daughter’s 2nd Christmas – Dec 2011 – Backed up.) So our wedding, all our travels before the kids, all the newlywed fun we used to have. That I have. All my pregnancy pictures with my daughter. Her first year and 4 months. My sister told me today she’s kept everything I’ve sen since mt daughter was born (4 years) so she will send me those. Plus, I’m heading over to my parents’ tonight. *fingers crossed*. I’ve lost all Little Miss’ 2nd and 3rd Bday pictures. With her 4th just around the corner, that ways on me more than I would like to admit.

      Like

  5. jemills56 says:

    I feel for you. I’m holding on to my dead laptop because it contains a number of photos that cannot be replaced, many of my late father. I need to check out if I still have the data on the memory cards from my camera. I also lost some family history material that was emailed to me from a distant cousin. For a ‘sentimental hoarder’ it was upsetting….I hope you find the material you are looking for. x

    Like

    • Yanic A. says:

      Thank you… I love that : “Sentimental hoarder”, that is me. Physical things, I can do without… but I always had in my mind that digital clutter was fine, it doesn’t really take up any space, you know? But now I realize that it s just as much of a burden. I was able to get a few hundred back so I at least have a good progression of my kids growing up. And really, later on, would I have wanted to pass on 10000 pictures to let them sort it out? No, I think I would have picked and chosen. So maybe this was it… a first purge. Who knows.

      So sorry for your digital loses as well. I hope your old hard drive is still in shape.

      Like

  6. beautiful! Happy Monday to you all

    Like

  7. bitsofthepast says:

    I am so sorry! The first thing I thought of though was how you have just had pictures on your blog for the past month. What a blessing to have this blog and pictures here, but I know this will never replace the memories not documents. Thinking of you!

    Like

    • Yanic A. says:

      Thank you… Heaven works in mysterious ways, doesn’t it? It was a series of things really : My blog and how picture intensive I’ve been, my obsession with sending pictures to the kids’ grand-parents and God mothers and the fact that Facebook never deleted my single profile after my hubby and I joined into a family profile about 1 month ago. I feel like I’m missing a message there somewhere… I’m sure I’ll figure out what the powers that be are trying to tell me. In the mean time, I’m taking more picture and backing them up as I go!

      Like

  8. Pingback: New start, new memories, fresh paint! | Family, Faith, Food and Fabric

  9. kittywilkin says:

    Ohhhhh no! Photos are the absolute hardest thing to lose!! I hope you can recover many, at least enough to recreate some thought-to-be-lost memories. ❤

    Like

  10. That’s awful, I’m sorry that happened to you! Years back, I hit my laptop with my fist out of frustration and ended up crashing MY ENTIRE HARD DRIVE. I lost years of recorded music (piano, vocal, and band-related). It was heart-wrenching. But, this too shall pass ❤ good luck getting as many back as you can!

    Like

    • Yanic A. says:

      I cannot imagine you hitting anything in rage, but I guess we all have those seeds don’t we? So sorry for your loss as well. It’s so funny to be attached to something that has no physical self. That has been triggering great reflection since it happened. xo

      Like

      • Haha like I said, it was many years ago 😉 it was one of my first good lessons on letting go of attachment. Glad to hear you’ve managed to collect a decent amount of them back, hope you find even more!

        Like

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