Being a parent…
As we are fast approaching the end of our Little Miss’ 4th turn around the sun, I’m finding myself honestly more and more pensive about our journey together so far.
When you become a parent for the first time, you are filled with dreams and ideals. You quickly find out some will come true and others will, unavoidably be out of your control.
I like to think that I’m a pretty good mom : I try to be there constantly, I have forgotten about myself more often than I care to mention and I would like to think that the example I set for my kids is one that will help guide them in their choices in their future lives.
But I still get knocked down a peg more often than I would also care to mention and that always leaves me feeling like much less of a good mom. A harsh reality I’ve come to grips with this year is that no matter what you do, preschoolers can be blunt, curt, often egocentric and sometimes just plain out mean. And I’m okay with that : They have no filter at that age, which most times, makes them really refreshing. They are learning about social convention and are slowly realizing that they are not always at the center of things and every once in a while, things need to revolve around something/someone else.
But every once in a while, my heart bleeds. Tears well up, hands go numb, something in me shatters and I need to walk away. And that is when I feel the less like a good mom.
This morning was one of those mornings.
And I know the feeling will pass as I go about my day, but for now, I have walked away.
Wishing you a day filled with “walking toward”.