Doctor Jekyll and mini-Mr. Hyde – Working on my faith

A normal day with my beautiful son is a day of routine. I’ve never experienced a child so predictable. He wakes up with us in the morning around 6am and keeps us company as his dad and sister get ready to leave for the day. The moment they are gone, he drinks his bottle and then plays, waiting to eat his breakfast by 7h30am.

Around 8am, he goes down for a first catnap and wakes up around 9am. When he wakes up, giggly and happy, we spend the morning playing, laughing, working our way to a bottle and another nap from 11am to noon.

Lunch, play and our daily walk brings us to tub time and yet another bottle before he has his 3rd nap of the day from 4pm until sissy and daddy come home around 5pm. Then family time is spent until all kiddos are put to bed around 7h30pm.

So mom and dad get a few hours together, which is precious to us and we thank our lucky stars everyday for such regularity and balance to our days.

We go to bed around 9h30pm after a few hours of sharing house work, thoughts of our day, a TV show, some snuggles on the couch… lights go out, lid close shut, but for the last month, the routine does not end there.

sleeping deep

11h30pm, give or take a few minutes, a whine and a cry, a scream of terror. Little man settles into his first night terror (or confusional event) of the night. We try to reassure him, he thrashes and cries. We try to hold him, he hits and kicks. 5 to 10 minutes go by and finally, his little exhausted body goes limp. Back to sleep he goes. Alarmed, destroyed, helpless, pumped full of adrenaline, my husband and I go back to bed, hoping to fall back to sleep, knowing 3 am is right around the corner… and it will start again.

For 4 weeks now, my little man’s night terrors have been throwing us for a loop. My mother’s heart bleeds. We know he’s not feeling any pain. We know he doesn’t remember them in the morning. We know that when 6am rolls around, he will wake up happy and giggly, ready to start another perfect day. Grey from sleep deprivation, my husband and I smile back at him, hoping this last night was just that, the last.

Apparently it will pass, apparently it is the age, apparently it is very common… but I can tell you now, my entire being wishes it wasn’t so.

So what seed am I working when my son’s turmoil and distress takes me from my dreams? So many of them I think : Compassion, loving-kindness, patience, wisdom… It is a challenge that I could curse, but I try very hard to thank the Heavens for : it will make me that much better of a parent, that much better of a human being. Buddha said :”Love all people as a mother loves her child”. If I learn to love my fellow man half as much as I love my son when I hold his trembling body in the dark of our room night after night, my world, I think, will be a wonderful place!

Good night everyone, wish us luck.

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About Yanic A.

Hello to all of you and thank you for stopping by! My name is Yanic. I'm a wife to a wonderful husband, a mother of 2 beautifully complex and unique children and a lover of all things inspiring. Having started a personal journey of self discovery when I found out I was pregnant with my daughter 4 years ago, I've since embraced a daily life of simpler pleasures and gratitude. As we get to know each other, you will know me as a quilter, a gardener, a Tao cultivator, a vegetarian foodie, a true believer in a healthy family life as being the secret to my happiness and hopefully as time goes on, a friend... I will try to share with you my days as they unfold, speaking of my happy successes without censoring my challenges, trying to make this blog a true portrait of the ever-changing path that I have chosen for myself. I'm hoping to find in these pages others to share with and learn from, bringing to light the absolute connection in all things and people, showing this world as being a true community.
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7 Responses to Doctor Jekyll and mini-Mr. Hyde – Working on my faith

  1. Such a lovely way to look at the challenges that face us as parents…what seed am I working? I was wondering the same thing this afternoon when my little man had a moment of Mr Hyde πŸ™‚ In those moments I keep saying the phrase “I have a choice, I have a choice” over and over in my head. It helps remind me that I have a choice in how I react, which often leads to a more compassionate, patient, kind and calm response on my part. And all of that is soon reflected back at me πŸ™‚

    So much learning and growth on this journey of motherhood. Wishing you luck tonight.

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    • quiltykanuck says:

      Thank you for your support an wishes… I agree with you, it is always a choice. Sometimes, half asleep, my first reaction is not always my best. But I cultivate patience and compassion at all hours, I try not to allow myself to wallow… the choice of unconditional love is always the right choice.

      Goodnight friend! Hope your first few days in the warm have been good to you! Happy birthday again. xox

      Like

  2. tinsenpup says:

    Poor baby! Poor Mama and Daddy! I hope it ends soon. 😦

    Like

    • quiltykanuck says:

      Thank you, you are very sweet… Last night wasn’t as bad. Since his episodes are timed so precisely, we set alarms 15 minutes before to wake him up, give him a drink of water, keep him awake for a few minutes and then put him back to sleep. Made for a broken night, but no actual night terrors… Apparently doing that a few nights in a row should break the cycle. *fingers crossed*

      Like

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